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Putting Yourself Out There
For writers, it’s all about putting yourself out there. Well, I supposed it’s really about putting your work out there. But if you’re a writer then you know that your work, your words, and the characters you painstakingly developed are a part of you. So when your new novel goes on sale, it’s a little like sending your baby off to kindergarten, which I also just did this week. Sniffle. You feel like you’ve sent a piece of yourself out into the world unprotected and you just cross your fingers and hope that everyone will love it and look after it.
Or maybe I’m just a sappy mess of snot with tissues shoved in my pockets because I’ve just kissed my baby and sent her down the hallway to her teacher who I hope will love her and care for her for the next 6 hours.
But when I really think about it, everyone—writer, reader, mother, sister, teacher, friend—must put themselves out there every single day. Everyday we put ourselves in an uncomfortable position, don’t we? Everyday we have to interact with strangers at the grocery store or at the mall or at the gas stations and hope we don’t say something silly or embarrassing. Everyday we have to chat with our boss about a project we’re working on to get feedback—yikes! And everyday we interact with our friends and colleagues and we hope that they don’t figure out that we are not nearly as cool or funny or interesting as they seem to think we are.
“Please don’t let me slip to Bill about how much I love Downton Abbey or that I had a dream about Swamp People last night? Please don’t let them find out that my DVR is full of Big Brother and Jersey Shore.”
Everyday we put ourselves out there and we hope for the best.
For Cassidy in Falling for You, she had to put herself out there more than I would ever be comfortable with. That’s why I wrote about it instead of doing it in real life. LOL! Cassidy was chosen for a reality TV dating show because her sister applied for to be a contestant in her name. And instead of running away screaming in fear, she decided to go for it. Cassidy decided to put herself out there, in front of a national viewing audience, and do something she’d never dreamed of doing before. She agreed to date a bachelor along with nine other women, competing in all kinds of tasks and all while being filmed by the hunkiest cameraman she’d ever laid eyes on. Talk about putting yourself out there for the world to see!
I think that it’s good practice to put ourselves into situations that we’re not 100% comfortable once in a while. I’m not saying dangerous situations, just something out of our comfort zone. Because when we’re out of our comfort zone and into unfamiliar territory, we might just surprise ourselves with how well we can handle anything that comes our way. Just like Cassidy handled Zoe Oliver, fellow contestant and b*tch with a size 2 jiggle-free ass, or how she dealt with her feelings for the not-exactly-unfamiliar bachelor or the drool-worthy cameraman.
Have you ever put yourself really out there only to be surprised by what you learned in the process?
I put myself out there every time one of my books is published and read. I hope you’ll go easy on me and remember that I stepped out of my comfort zone for your reading enjoyment.
“Please don’t let them learn that I wrote the entire book while in my comfy pants, sitting on the couch, eating tootsie rolls and drink coffee…” ;)
Happy reading!
Heather Thurmeier
Newly single Cassidy Quinn is thrilled to be a contestant on the new reality dating show The One. But her excitement turns to horror when the gorgeous bachelor turns out to be her ex-boyfriend. Seeing Brad again makes Cassidy realize she might not be as “over him” as she thought—and then she meets hunky cameraman Evan Burke.
After watching his brother lose his wife in a tragic accident, Evan vows never to fall in love. But following Cassidy around as her personal cameraman makes him question his decision, and resisting her gets harder with every sunbathing, bikini-wearing day.
Cassidy and Evan begin a forbidden affair while her ex-boyfriend tries to win her heart back one groping, awkward moment at a time. If Cassidy can manage to stop falling off horses (literally), stop falling onto her ex-boyfriend, the bachelor (yes, literally), and stop falling in love with backstage playboy Evan, she might still make it through the show without becoming a tabloid sensation.
But soon Cassidy must choose between the ex who broke her heart and the cameraman who might never love her back. For Cassidy, this reality show just got real.
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- Leave a comment answering this question: Have you ever put yourself really out there only to be surprised by what you learned in the process?
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I put myself out there by going into a male dominated career field while I was in the military. I chose to become an aircraft mechanic. And surprisingly I loved every minute of it. I did it for 11 years before being medically separated in 2009. I have never regretted the choice I made.
ReplyDeleteYour book sounds very sexy and interesting. I have to add it to my TBR list! And p.s. I won't tell anyone about the comfy pants and tootsie rolls since I'm sitting in my comfy pants eating cookies!
Thanks for keeping my secret, Patricia! LOL. And thanks for your 11 years of service in the military!!! I can't imagine doing what you do, but I applaud you for it.
DeleteYes. I think if we don't occasionally put ourselves out there we never have a chance to truly succeed. I have been lucky in the past and even though I am sure that there have been times that it was not successful... I really only remember good experiences.
ReplyDeleteHi Lavender! I agree and you have a wonderfully positive outlook on life. Love it!! You will never know how far you can succeed if you don't put yourself out there and try something new.
Deletei have a variety of learning disabilities along w/ ADD. and in grade 11 i had wanted to try advance biology. i LOVE science and wanted to see if i could succeed at a higher learning level then i was at. i was told i'd fail and that i'd have my heart broken. i told em to take a hike and let me TRY and that was whole POINT. well i got a 61% in the class and got an achievement award after struggling and getting a few things but i learned lots and found i was a better person for it and still am!
ReplyDeleteparisfan_ca@yahoo.com
Hi Laurie, I think it's awesome that in 11th grade you were strong enough and mature enough to ignore the nay-sayers and go into the class you really wanted. Who cares if you didn't walk out with 100% final grade. You did it, you learned some stuff you were interested in and you didn't give up. What an awesome story! Thank you for sharing it with me today!!
DeleteI am very much and introverted person so my day pretty much consists of going to work and going home. The most recent time I put myself out there was to go to going away party for one of the girls from work. It may not seem like much but for me it was a big step.
ReplyDeleteHi Kimberly, Good for you for going outside of your comfort zone to say goodbye to a friend. It can be so hard to take that first step of putting yourself out there, but I hope you had fun at the party and found it worth the effort. Maybe this step will lead to another!
DeleteI put myself out there by working with the elderly at Assisted Living place. Something I never saw myself doing and found out I loved. And was benefited by everything I learned from the elderly residents. They have so much cool history to share.
ReplyDeleteSue B
Good for You, Kat! I love elderly people. We can learn so much from the stories they tell. And nothing warms my heart more than an elderly couple still in love.
DeleteYes I have. At times it has been the best decision to make and the outcome was amazing at other times I wished I had smacked myself in the forehead for even contemplating it lol
ReplyDeleteThanks for the awesome giveaway!
cassandrahicks1989@yahoo.com
I guess we can't expect to win every time, Cassandra! But it's always great to try something new and totally different!
DeleteThanks for a great post and congrats to heather on the new release! Definitely adding to my wishlist. Ummm... the most daring thing I've ever done was go on a date from an online dating site. It was the very first one and we've been together for over 3 years. Don't know if I'd do it again though :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for adding FALLING FOR YOU to your TBR list! I hope you enjoy it.
DeleteFor me it was the profession I chose, or ended up in really. I've always been shy around strangers and not very talkative. When I got out of college, I would've taken any job I was offered so when I was offered a job as a recruiter (or headhunter) I was nervous since I'd have to talk to strangers all day, but I gave it a shot. One company even had me cold calling with a script. Now I've been in this profession for 13 years and am one of the top ranked in my company every year.
ReplyDeleteHi, Heather!
ReplyDeleteOnce I was with a bunch of folks I didn't know, and there was a mechanical bull. I wanted to ride it, but didn't because I thought I'd look silly. Well, I did it anyway, and had fun, and no one cared.
Hi Abigail! I've never ridden a mechanical bull but that sounds like a lot of fun!!
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMine was entering a writing contest. It was only 500 words and I was so scared because I am not good with grammer. But I tried. I was pleased with all the support from friends and family. I didn't win, I did place. And from what I have been told that's almost as good as winning. And I got some great feedback. Looking forward to reading your book. roya-clan@sbcglobal.net
ReplyDeleteI put myself out there by going abroad during college on my own instead of with a school program. I wanted to attend the Sorbonne University in Paris and whew made it! I learned so much about myself, family, and life. Wouldn't trade those experiences for anything!
ReplyDeleteWow! Studying abroad takes a lot of confidence and belief in yourself. Good for you! I can only imagine all the amazing things you did while there.
DeleteI guess when I put myself out there the most was when I started college after being out of school for about 5 years. Even though I was only a few years older than most of the students, it was hard because I am a very introverted person. So, of course I pick education to go into, lol. Unfortunately, due to an accident that messed up my back & hip, I can not use my degree. I can not stand for more than 10-15 minutes, but due to blood clotting issues, can not sit for long periods either. Basically, I am just a mess, lol.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear about your accident, June. I can't even imagine the adjustments you've had to make to your daily life to accommodate your new needs. Thank goodness for books to take us places we could never go on our own!!
DeleteI was always very shy and didn't date much. When I met my future spouse, we had an instant connection, but he didn't ask me out. We saw each other a few more times at parties, and each time we'd talk, and then he wouldn't call me. I finally got up the courage to ask him out. Turns out, he's even shyer than I am. If I hadn't made a move, nothing would ever have happened.
ReplyDeleteI love your story, Jen!! How awesome that you took the step and it turned into your own romance!
DeleteI consider myself to be very introverted. Meeting and making friends is very difficult for me. But I have made a few dear and wonderful friends by putting my self out there.
ReplyDeletemel
While raising my kids I did all kinds of things that I had no idea what I was doing from running Girl Scout meetings to helping at field day.
ReplyDeleteI just recently put myself out there by finally starting to tell people that I was writing a book! I had started and given up so many times in the past that I never wanted to suffer the humiliation of letting people in on my little secret. I discovered that by telling people, I started believing in myself. My goals are babysteps, not the NYT Bestseller list. I share my word count goals, my new pages, things like that. I was surprised by how enthusiastic and supportive people have been.
ReplyDeleteHi Monica, Telling people you're writing a book really is putting yourself out there. Keep believing in yourself and your dream. NEVER stop trying if you really want to write that book, even if it takes you a few years. The sense of accomplishment you'll feel is indescribable... even for a writer! LOL
Deletei have put myself out there. im a shy person, and in a way socially with drawn, and i find it hard being around people. My mom met her dad, i was 17, i think, and it was a big family gathering. You cant imagine how hard it was being around all those strangers. I was uncomfortable, but im glad i did.
ReplyDeleteI'm extremely introverted and have a mild anxiety disorder that really ramps up whenever I have to do some public speaking. I'm also a science doctoral student, where giving talks is a common part of our education-- so I volunteered to give two talks in the department and within our doctoral programme in the last couple of months to try to overcome some of my aversion! Felt like I was going to go mad leading up to them, but the talks themselves went really well & I'm glad I did them. Now for my dissertation defence...
ReplyDeleteCris, that's amazing! Way to face your fears head on!! Now don't ask me to do the same. Locking me in a room full of spiders would have be breaking through walls with my bare hands!
DeleteI put myself out there everyday as I work in the health care field....it's amazing what just a thoughtful gesture can do to a patient and their outlook ;)
ReplyDeleteDefinitely TBR - I put myself out there by being in a male dominated industry - I dont regret it as it has made me a more outgoing individual :)
ReplyDeleteYes, I have.
ReplyDeleteHave you ever put yourself really out there only to be surprised by what you learned in the process? definitely ;)
ReplyDeleteWhen I was working (before becoming a stay at home mom) at my last full time job, I put myself out there by going to district manager and explaining some problems in procedures (that this company has been doing for over 20 years) and ways they could be corrected and was very surprised that my input was accepted and implemented within a few weeks. Saved company money and I received a promotion. This was very hard for me because I am an introvert and talking to a boss was nerve racking but it did work!
ReplyDeletesusanmplatt AT hotmail DOT com