The toxic guilt of his past left Quinton Carter in pieces—until one girl unexpectedly put him back together. Thanks to Nova Reed, Quinton sees the world with clear eyes. And though he'd eventually love to hold her in his arms every day... he's not ready yet.Playing drums in a band and living with her best friends are just some of the highlights of Nova's life. But the best new development? Talking to Quinton on the phone each night. She wishes she could be with him, but she knows he needs time to heal. Yet, shocking news is on the way, and Nova will need Quinton like he once needed her. Is he strong enough to leap out of his broken past...and into Nova's heart?This may contain confidential material. If you are not an intended recipient, please notify the sender, delete immediately, and understand that no disclosure or reliance on the information herein is permitted. Hachette Book Group may monitor email to and from our network.
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“I have to tell you something else, but it’s not good—it’s bad.” Before I can chicken out, I hurry and sputter, “Someone gave me a bag of meth today and I have it underneath my mattress.” As soon as I say it, I wonder why the hell I thought this was a good idea, throwing this on her. I need to stop relying on her so much—need to stand on my own two feet.
I’m about to hang up, because really it’s the only choice, but then she says, “Did you do any of it?”
“No.” My voice shakes as I grip the side of the mattress and battle to breathe evenly.
“Do you want to?” she asks calmly.
“Yes.” My voice is full of desperation.
“Are you… are you going to?” There’s a hint of worry in her tone.
“I’m not sure,” I admit. “I want to, but I also want to throw it away.”
“Then throw it away,” she says, as if it’s the easiest thing in the world to do.
“I don’t think I can.” My hands quiver just at the thought of it and I rest my forehead on the mattress, still on my knees “It feels fucking impossible.”
“Yes, you can.” She sounds so certain and I have no idea how she’s doing it—managing to sound so calm when I know she can’t be. “Just take it and dump it down the toilet. You can do this. I know you can.”
“You have too much faith in me,” I say, slipping my fingers between the bed and the mattress, fighting the urge to hang up on her and turn to what’s only inches away from my fingertips.
“No, I have the right amount,” she replies. “Now let me know when you have it and you’re headed to the bathroom. And don’t hang up on me.” It’s like she can read my mind.
I sit there forever, going back and forth with what I want and need to do. At one point I grab the bag of crystal and put it back. Then pull it out again and open it, staring at the white crystals so close I can almost taste them. But I can also hear Nova breathing on the other end. Soft and full of concern. Acting calm, when I’m sure she’s freaking out. I want to throw them away just for her, but I have to wonder if it’s possible to care for someone so much that I’d give this up. Do I care for her that much?
After a lot of deliberating, I come to one simple answer.
Yes. I care about her that much.
I get to my feet and make my way to the bathroom, not speaking. Then I lift up the toilet seat and, shutting my eyes, I tip the bag over, pour the contents into the water, and flush them down.
“Did you do it?” Nova asks at the sound of the flushing.
I press my lips together, resting back against the bathroom wall, realizing how sweaty I am and how much I’m gasping for air. “I did.”
“See, I knew you could do it,” she says with relief in her voice. “I knew you’d do the right thing.”
The right thing? Is that what I just did? Sometimes it feels like it is, but there are other times when it feels like what I’m doing is so wrong and disrespectful to Lexi. But through the right and wrong, there’s always one thing that gives me hope and that’s Nova. She’s what keeps me going.
Jessica Sorensen is the author of The New York Times and USA Today Bestsellers, The Secret of Ella and Micha, The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden, and Breaking Nova, which are New Adult Contemporary novels. She also writes Paranormal series, including the Fallen Star Series, Shattered Promises, Darkness Falls, and the Death Collectors. She loves writing and reading and is an avid watcher of TV series The Vampire Diaries and Modern Family. An immense music lover, Jessica immerses herself in her music as she writes. She has a broad taste in music, and a list of favorite songs that goes on for miles! A few of her current favorite bands are Chevelle, Rise Against, Alkaline Trio, Brand New, Death Cab for Cutie, Flight 409, and Nirvana. Some of Jessica’s favorite “watch it over, and over again” movies include Anywhere but Here, Juno, Pride and Prejudice, The Hangover, and Bad Teacher.
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